THX 0477

Joined May 2009.

552 stories, 6 challenges, 5998 comments, and 28 friends

Dr. Tim’s Neurotic Rules of Ficly Life

[Disclaimer: This is not intended to be binding nor in any way an expectation of general members of Ficly, league members, family members or wearers of Member’s Only jackets]

1. Comment to Story posting ratio must exceed 5:1. Goal is 10:1. In other words, I write a story then find five others (at least) upon which to comment before writing another.

2. For every solo shot or sequel of my own material, I must write a sequel or prequel to the work of another author. If I’m going easy on myself, participating in a challenge also fulfills this requirement.

3. If someone comments on one of my stories, I go find one of theirs upon which to comment. It only seems fair, and I like to think it encourages commenting.

4. Awesomeness is the goal, always. Call me on it when I fail, please.

5. Clearly mark mature content and err on the side of caution.

6. Golden Rule remains in effect for all sequels, prequels, and comments.


  1. So Many Battles

    Dust and sweat, god, all I know is dust and sweat. Upon the rise outside the arena the captain of the Asclepian Guard tugs at the cloth armor about him. Jealous eyes consider the frivolity of the arena, while his soul, a slave of duty, adjures his glan...

  2. A Burning in the Darkness

    From her body, tightened into a quiet ball, a trembling hand began to venture. Meanwhile the languid voice practically sang, “Frauenzimmer, frauenzimmer…” Her breath slowed, a deliberate in and out of musty air. Battered fingers made ...

  3. Moment With Poseiden

    The sun caresses face and back, free of restraint or judgment. Waves roll in, each unique and glorious in their insistence. Sand swirls in the undertow and under toe. I am bounded by the water, held in its embrace. I sway with the motion, brace for the...

  4. In a Dark Garden

    Scrambling in silent slow motion she made her way through a labyrinth of dusty boxes and pipework. The boarding school basement closed around her, a cold grip both disturbing and comforting. If only she could burrow deep enough perhaps he wouldn’...

  5. Under a Shady Tree

    Contended I sat beneath a shady tree. True, at the moment it only shaded me from the cool, pale rays of the moon, but for some reason I insisted upon calling it a shady tree and humming a children’s song to myself. The day was done and spent, as ...

  6. A Testament of Wildflowers

    Battle weary and ripe with the bloodlust of conquest the war party collapsed in the dust of the road. One figure, armor faded and chipped, strode placidly into the nearby field’s verdant embrace. Only when he was a stone’s throw away did he...

  7. What the Fräulein Owes

    Ka-chatk, ka-chitk, came the finely soled shoes down the cellar stairs. Sarah struggled to restrain her breath, ragged and desperate to break into heady gasps. “Fräulein,” called the silken voice, “du bist der Gott einen Tod schuldig...

  8. Colony Z, Chapter 8

    “I know, I know, I know! Shut ’em off!” Dr Kras shouted over the medi-alert klaxons pinging him from every direction. The AI obliged after a pause that could only be construed as grudging disobedience. Everyone swore AI’s didn&#...

  9. Good Riddance or Good Luck

    “Smeg, smeg, fecal-impacted smeg!” Harvey repeated to himself as he staggered out of the stable. His hands checked sore points for the presence of blood and brushed off straw and dust. “Visit the stables during a decel, smegging brill...

  10. Fishy Work to Do

    Floating in the middle of the kitchen, just below eye level, Martin puckered and blinked his bulging eyes. Swirls of water lolled about him, aqueous satellites to a tiny, fishy planet. Every utensil, plate, cup, and bowl were strewn about, some cracked...

  11. A Non-Oprah-esque Aha Moment

    With trepidation, and no small amount of anxiety I made the preparations. Winter gear went in the A4 bag. Uniforms stacked neatly in the rolling camo bag. All manner of necessities filled the available space in each. Orders cut, flight booked and no ch...

  12. Thoughts in a Silent Den

    Spartan yet elegant, the den consisted of three irregularly shaped sofas around a splatter-shaped glass coffee table. Two tall windows nestled between bare bookshelves, looking out at the swirling, glowing surface of the shield. Dim lights glistened ac...

  13. Little Dreamer's Gone to War

    Little dreamer’s gone to war Still in the fight before Called upon off he goes Didn’t volunteer Won’t say no Shall we call this bravery Up for the pounding In for a penny Up til now up to fantasy Imagination’s lad Flights of fan...

  14. Views From a Jungle

    You proceed into a jungle you hesitate to consider “man made”. Perfect sunlight streams through a little more than half of the innumerable panes of glass. The other panes seem to face into various parts of the house with the building’...

  15. Every House Needs One or More

    Rennik acknowledged with a grunt the man at the next urinal. The tile made the noise resound like that of a wild beast in its cave. The man teased with a grin, “Watch yer aim, sonny. Boys pee on the wall…and real men pee on the ceiling.R...

  16. Very Small Assault

    “Mum, the lawn gnomes are moving.” “What, Mika? We don’t…” The kettle’s impertenent blare interrupted her thought. More ritual than conscious effort, Hattie made tea, nothing exotic or fancy, just tea. Such was...

  17. Possible Somnambulism or Worse

    Much to his surprise, Theodore awoke several miles from his house. A sunrise to rival any motel art rested over suburbia welcoming him to consciousness. As he became aware that he was walking, the motion ceased, leaving him on the corner of Douglas and...

  18. One and Many More

    The window unit on the Studebaker did little to quell the desert heat, beyond perhaps creating a crosswind of stale, baked air. Fecke told himself it was still somewhat refreshing as he tugged at the holster where it dug into his shoulder. One more lie...

  19. Oblations of Offal

    Scraps of meat sizzled in the battered pan, dropped in the course of a crude butchering job on a woodland rodent. Perhaps drawn by the aroma, such as it was, a crow came slick as midnight to stalk the ground beside the fire. Ethrel cocked an eyebrow, &...

  20. Edifice's Reluctance

    Grammy Lo moaned, eyes lolling back. The air in front of the gargoyles wavered, a flicker of reality you could easily miss. With a nod Curr was off, zig-zagging low amongst the ornamental shrubbery. N-ka began a slower, slinking course to follow. ̶...

  21. Distraction (Superhero Black Hole: Part 20)

    I must be resolute. I must be firm. My gut wants to hate her, and my head wants to fear her, but… Clang, bonk, boing, thud… What are you doing? The tone is one part condescention and two parts annoyance. At least that much felt familiar. No...

  22. Primitive Alien Gods

    Bravado barely concealing sheer panic, Roderick bellowed, “RUN!” All four men and the lone woman of the group careened through the lush undergrowth, an unseen but hideously imagined beast thundering in the dark after them. Alien birds hoote...

  23. Funny Victory

    That memory struck me about midway through a 20 meter sprint to the next available cover, a toppled fruit stand. By the time my gear and I came tumbling to a stop on its far side the giggles overtook me. A grenade went off, and someone swore loudly in ...

  24. Piss Poor Comfort

    Just before dawn and half past dead the floor on the way to the bathroom swung beneath my feet. The clock’s pendulum had nothing on me and my sorry existence. Gin never did agree with me; that was your bottle. Sorry I drank it. Somewhere between ...

  25. Salamander's Gold

    Cool water slid over bared feet, albeit at a comfortably shallow depth. Todd’s ears neglected the noise from his friends’ carrying on, deferring instead to his eyes as they scanned amongst the rock and muck. Each gingerly displaced rock sen...

  26. In the Water, Mother Dear

    Glee and humidity filled the air around the swimming hole. The latter made Todd’s white T cling to his chest. The former gave his heart a pinch. “Git in the water, Pistol,” cheered his cousin, using Todd’s familiar name rather t...

  27. Derailing Inanity

    “Sergeant, can I be frank?” “Only if I can be Ernest, sir.” “A fair point, but in retrospect, perhaps you should be frank, and I shall be earnest.” “Either way I’m not sure I like the direction this conve...

  28. Arabesque, Suggest, Acquiesce

    Roderick took the quiet mumbles as permission to continue his self expression, which he did with gusto. His mother flopped down at the dining room table, sifting through bills without actually seeing any of them. Her mind clanked painfully over punishm...

  29. Bad Time for Reflection, Introspection, and Inattentiveness

    We stared at each other as the moon slowly gave way to a dim sunrise. I did at least; he vacantly pointed glossy eyes in my direction while groping the air. Obviously a bad time to be thus, I was transfixed. Something inside me wanted to say I knew the...

  30. The Boy in the Well

    More instinct and poor coordination than combat skills I rolled backwards, my flailing leg sending Sebastian hurtling over top of me and into the dark cabin. A noise half whimper and half gurgle met me as I scrambled to my feet and around. Back out of ...

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