Into The Wood

Avatar Author: kaellinn18 Follow me on Twitter: http://twitter.com/kaellinn18 I love to write. One of my life goals is to write a novel, but right now work, church, and family take up most of my spare time. This site helps me scratch that writi... Read Bio

“I don’t think this is a good idea,” Joylyn moaned. “Nania says the shadowtrees eat children when both the moon and sun are sleeping.” The sky was inky black, a dark blanket enveloping the world. Ahead, Zin’s torch sputtered and sparked, the light giving ghostly life to the edge of the dark wood.

“You’re such a globberworm, Joy,” Zin mocked over his shoulder. “Nania’s just trying to scare you. If you’re too frightened then go home. We’ll find the star rubies without you.”

Joylyn paused and looked back at the slumbering village. It seemed a lot further away than she remembered, too far to return alone. She clutched her blanket tightly. The light around her began to fade, and she ran to catch up with the rest as they entered the forest. Under the canopy, the fire played more ominous tricks. The gnarled branches seemed to grasp for Joylyn, yearning to wrench her into their twisted trunks. She sobbed quietly as she followed the rest down the path.

High above, ten pairs of red eyes followed them hungrily.

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Comments (5 so far!)

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  1. Avatar kaellinn18

    Props to Abby for coming up with the term “globberworm!”

  2. Avatar Mostly Harmless

    Blimey. Incredibly inventive and written with a total grasp of tone and atmosphere… You’re naming automatically helps the presumably fantastical world take shape, and some of your similes are quite daring!

    Overall, perfect. I’m actually impressed by how much there is here, the pace is very good. And of course, a tantalising last line. Certainly one of your best K… MH :)

  3. Avatar kaellinn18

    Yeah, I definitely liked this story better than the other one that you commented on earlier. I can actually see this one going somewhere, where The Deal Is On Hold seems more like a standalone scene. Thanks for the comment!

  4. Avatar ElshaHawk (LoA)

    You have captured her terror here so vividly, and also the older sibling’s brush off of the fear, leaving us with a valid reason to be afraid. :)

  5. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    Ooh, that’s not good. I like the balance from the start to introduce the fears, the dismissal of them as childish, and then bringing back it to them being in real danger.

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