Now I must admit I’m a big fan of the Gatsby so I enjoyed this piece. Takes me back to my studies, especially the bit about Nick and whether or not he’s reliable. Sneaky old Nick.

In the third paragraph ‘whilst’ is missing it’s ‘l’ and it is also repeated twice though I didn’t really notice until I read it over again. The run-on sentence about Mrs Dookes and Charlie could maybe be split into two separate sentences but it’s no big deal. Nothing really wrong with run-on sentences so long as they aren’t overused.

Aside from that this is a really enjoyable little story :)

Thanks. I love the Great Gatsby too, but my friend absolutely hates it! I hate the books I’m doing for coursework :S

I read that book last year…I really liked it, and I really liked this piece. I want to know how it will change her life!
Just a thought…should the Mrs. have a period, or is that a British thing I don’t understand?

Well, I’ve never putt a full stop (lol) after Mrs or Mr :)

I’m not sure it matters though I always put stops after Mrs and Mr but that might be force of habit.