Sentient

Avatar Author: Radical Yellow Duck Ok, I'm back. One heart attack, a triple CABG (Coronary Artery Bypass Graft, pronounced cabbage) and two sessions of beating my computer into submission. I am back. I'm old. Real old. I'm so old I remember when dial... Read Bio

That has some unusual coloration. How did you achieve it?

The polymer coating reflects more light in the 600 nanometer scale. As a result it shows a more orange tint than the standard yellow.

I thought standard was more of a black and white.

Yes, but we found that the organics in the black and white were not conducive to the effects we were looking for. The yellow variant proved more suitable.

Well if it works, we can sell it.

There is one problem. When you twist the substrates to separate, it does produce a disturbing audible effect. Let me demonstrate.

He grasped the discs in his fingertips. With a quick motion he rotated the disc, one clockwise, the other counter clockwise. A shriek of amazing volume filled the room.

What the hell is that?

The polymerization combined with the organic substrate to make what is essentially a sentient entity. What you heard was its death cry.

Sentient OREO’s? Oreos that scream?

Only the orange ones.

Well, maybe we can sell them during Halloween.

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Comments (9 so far!)

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  1. Avatar Mostly Harmless

    It took me a while to get it, but when I did, the word ‘genius’ sprung to mind… It’s pals ‘maverick’ and ‘mallard’ turned up too, just for the heck of it…

    Really very funny, and a tad creepy – bringing tasty, twistable snacks to life? You can’t argue with the originality! MH :)

  2. Avatar Browncoatben

    This…..is……epic.

    Reminds me of one I wrote back on Ficlets. I’ll find it and post as a sequel.

  3. Avatar ElshaHawk (LoA)

    oh my.. this was perfectly executed! mind the pun.

  4. Avatar OrangeOreos (LoA)

    (completely trips on Elsha’s pun)

    Hey! Watch where you drop those!

    Anyways, back on topic: RYD, you are a cruel, cruel being… You mess with my brothers, you mess with me.

  5. Avatar Browncoatben

    Oops…I meant to rank 5 stars earlier…

    Curse you, iPhone blundering fingers!!!

  6. Avatar kaellinn18

    Hahaha, this is twisted and great!

  7. Avatar g²LaPianistaIrlandesa

    Haha! Certainly didn’t see this one coming, quite excellent! Poor, poor Orange… I don’t think he expected this either.

  8. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    Took me a bit to understand what was going on. Simple quotation marks might have been clearer than the italics use. Still, hilarious way to creep up on your fellow author’s name and make something funny and disturbing.

  9. Avatar August Rode

    The idea of sentient Oreos is certainly a twist, and you executed it well. If there was anything that I might recommend, it would be to shorten the sentence “With a quick motion he rotated the disc, one clockwise, the other counter clockwise.” to “With a quick motion he rotated the discs in opposite directions.”

Inspired by

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Duck by OrangeOreos (LoA)

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