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Avatar Author: Nathaniel Payne I'm just a guy that likes to write. Mainly science fiction and a little light fantasy. I also like to play video games and spend time with my awesome family. I'm currently working on a 365 challenge! I will attempt to ... Read Bio

She was nothing more than a shadow on the museum walls. She was a quick-moving creature built of air and mist, darting in and out amongst the assorted artifacts and ancient accoutrements, slinking her svelte form around the assembled heirlooms of antiquity. She was a ghost.

Growing up, she showed a natural talent for stealth. Her father used to joke that she was as quiet as a mouse.

Mice squeaked. She, most decidedly, did not.

She slid into a room and listened as the security guard was loudly making his rounds. She waited, catching her breath behind her teeth, quietly daring herself to go through with her plan. As the guard neared her hiding place, she stepped out and deftly unzipped her top.

He paused. Eyes transfixed, mouth agape. She leaned forward, and kissed him. He practically melted in her arms. He grew limp and slumped with a sickening crack to the concrete floor. She pulled the syringe out of his arm and continued on, a slight skip of exuberance in her step.

The next room held her trophy.

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Comments (7 so far!)

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  1. Avatar kaellinn18

    I have to say, if I were to be knocked out by a sexy female thief, that would be the way to go.

  2. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    Awesome, hilarious moment deftly told. Really liked the bits of back story as well. Only critique would be the use of present tense for her not squeaking. It’s semi-justifiable, I think, but personal preference would be for it to stay past tense.

  3. Avatar Mostly Harmless

    Really brilliant descriptions here which set the scene fantastically…

    I love how this moves from thrilling espionage to perfectly-pitched hilariosity in the space of a couple of paragraphs – still keeping a decent plot sandwiched in between the two!

    MH :)

  4. Avatar Nathaniel Payne

    Agreed, THX – I hadn’t even noticed that until you mentioned it. Fixed.

    Thanks for the props, gentlemen! This was a fun one to write. I had it in mind when I wrote the original, but hadn’t even considered writing it until someone mentioned it in the comments. :)

  5. Avatar Ridcully Calvert

    Very nicely done, I enjoyed it

  6. Avatar Mr.Gabriel

    Wow, I actually had a story like this in mind. Started it in English class, but couldn’t finish it. I liked this one, nicely told.

  7. Avatar ElshaHawk (LoA)

    boobs FTW! and syringes.. great combo. :)

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