Mount Vesuvius Eat Your Heart Out!

Avatar Author: Mostly Harmless Mostly Harmless, formerly of the League of Awesomeness, has left Ficly. This is, I hope, a temporary thing. I need to concentrate on my studies, and I'd rather take a break than have my writing suffer. I intend to... Read Bio

I DISTINCTLY REMEMBER I WAS STILL GORGEOUS WHEN I WENT TO BED!

Smooth and soft, with a painstakingly cultivated healthy but not conspicuous tan, my skin is supposed to be envious! My pimple-plagued peers would die for the utter kissability of my regularly moisturised face!

Last night, my visage was a veritable ocean of porcelain pores, and now…

The prospect of walking through the school corridors in less than an hour can only be compared to venturing into the jaws of Hell.

Naked.

With ‘Vote For God!’ tattooed across my chest.

It is very possible that the collective vengeful wishes of my envious classmates have finally been granted – that the Lady Injustice paid a visit to get back at me for the years of outshining every other girl in town, and this is the result.

A single, pulsating pustule, a crimson monument to all that is grotesque in this world; shining like a great beacon of ugliness for all to see.

More than an imperfection, it’s a mistake. A weakness.

If I’m not flawless, what am I?

View this story's details

Prequels

Oh no! This story doesn't have a prequel. Want to fill in the blanks and write one?

Write a Prequel

Sequels

Oh no! This story doesn't have a sequel. Want to fill in the blanks and write one?

Write a Sequel

Comments (14 so far!)

Average Reader Rating

  1. Avatar Catherine

    This put a smile on my face especially the comparison of walking into the jaws of Hell. I liked how you never actually went out and said what her flaw was. And the title was dare I say it, epic.

  2. Avatar kaellinn18

    The faux gravitas of this situation is highly amusing. I, too, enjoyed the comparison to entering Hell. Very silly, but I’m sure that some teenage girls feel like this.

  3. Avatar someday_93

    This made me laugh…I know there are definitely girls out there who feel like this, and this was a really funny look inside this girl’s head.

  4. Avatar Lighty

    Oh, can we say hyperbole, altogether now! This was a highly amusing piece of teenage angst, verging on the ridiculous but the last line lends it something deeper. I like how in the end we get to see her real insecurity, the feeling of being lost in that last question. ‘What am I?’ Very nicely done and subtle!

  5. Avatar Kant's Platypus

    Hah, nicely done, gave me a nice chuckle. As kaellinn18 said, the faux gravitas is great.

  6. Avatar Elisabeth L. Davis(LoA)

    Haha, I love this. I know girls like this. Heh.

  7. Avatar ElshaHawk (LoA)

    hahaha! loved it! the pimple of doom! I agree with lighty.

  8. Avatar PJ Deane [[LoA]]

    Ah, yes the first spot.
    I remember my first spot and it happened something like this. Gaping in horror at my face in the mirror.
    My brother on the other hand seems to nourish his spots, as they seem to get bigger and greasier as he refuses to use the cleanser.
    Enjoy that image.

    In a nutshell : love. Totally captures what goes through a girl’s brain, despite being called ‘Ed’.
    Wondering if that’s a girl’s name as well…

  9. Avatar Tsu D'nehm

    I think Lighty’s right, it’s the last line that gives real meaning to this story. But meaning aside, you capture fantastically the tide of emotional babblings going on there, and I do love irony in any form.
    Woulnd’t mind seeing this “Lady Injustice” personified (or should that be anthropomorphised :P) into a character herself.

    P.S.
    @PJ As a vague aquaintance of his, I can confirm that Ed isn’t in fact short for Edwina or Edna, hilarious as that would no doubt be.

  10. Avatar Mostly Harmless

    Ha, what a sequel: ‘The Lady Injustice Strikes Again!’

    Thanks all for the reviews, and, though Edwina or Edna WOULD be hilarious, the fact that my name is actually Egbert has not stopped me receiving an unbroken barrage of only sometimes well-intentioned ridicule throughout my life.

    I’ll stick with Ed!

  11. Avatar PJ Deane [[LoA]]

    You are joking… Egbert?! I have officially met an Egbert. I can check that off my list. Only a Tarquin, Harrington-Smythe and the Queen to go!

  12. Avatar Abby Wall (LoA)

    that’s funny…giggle!!!!!!

  13. Avatar Nathaniel Payne

    Gorgeous! That’s all I have to say. Absolutely gorgeous! :)

  14. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    Horrifying ode to acne from an appropriately dramatic point of view. Nicely told and a very fun read.