Sin by Numbers

Ahfl_icon Author: THX 0477 Dr. Tim's Neurotic Rules of Ficly Life [Disclaimer: This is not intended to be binding nor in any way an expectation of general members of Ficly, league members, family members or wearers of Member's Only jackets] ... Read Bio

Cruising along at 83 mph, Carl gave a bemused smile to the religious billboard, 5 of the ten commandments. He knew on his return trip he’d be treated to a view of the remaining Biblical directives. 1 hour to drive to the Hilliard/Rome exit, the same to drive back.

He’d always liked the commandments, a handy list, easy to review. There was a certain comfort in looking over these terribly important admonitions and restrictions and being able to honestly and forthrightly say, “Hey, at least I’m not breaking those 2.” He felt the same away about the 7 deadly sins. No one could accuse him of sloth.

The idiot on the radio finally shut up, making way for Steppenwolf. Carl’s bemused grin shifted to a wicked smile. 4 months he’d been making this trip, back and forth, knowing she’d be waiting for him, waiting to be wild, as they were both born to be. She’d be waiting in some frilly thing, and he’d pounce her, like a lion taking a gazelle. They’d be absolutely sinful, 6 ways to Sunday, then he’d go home.

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Comments (5 so far!)

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  1. Avatar Krulltar

    Somehow I thought this was written for a some numbers challenge, and even though it isn’t a challenge entry, why didn’t you use the number 9?

    Overall, I enjoyed the subtle details that added depth to the story.

  2. Avatar ~Eagle~My~Beagle

    “Waiting to be wild, as they were both born to be.” A very graceful way to refer back to the Steppenwolf. Many writers don’t have that knack for subtlety. Bravo.

  3. Avatar Tad Winslow

    Did the inspiration for this ficly spring from a drive from Dayton to Columbus by any chance? I remember seeing those highway signs when I lived in Ohio.

  4. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    Woohoo, Tad wins it for the obscure geographical allusion. Yep, that’s the drive, Dayton to Columbus. Hilliard/Rome exit is just short of Columbus.

    And I didn’t use 9 just to make you wonder…that and I forgot to use it, cause I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep lately. All that driving back and forth, well…you know.

  5. Avatar D.E DeWitt

    I once had a job where I had a 4 hour a day commute. Totally understand.

    I think the 2nd paragraph is my favorite of the 3. I think a lot of people view the 10 commandments that way, even though that’s not how they’re intended to be seen. I’ve even done it myself!

    But in all honesty, I think your writing is above the lion and gazelle cliche.