Duck Hunting

Avatar Author: Henjo Hello, my name is Henjo. I am intrested in writing, and really like to be creative. I hope you like my stories and can give me some feedback. Read Bio

I zipped up my duck suit, and put on my trainers. It was time to go.

“Right. When i say go, run as fast as you can, i will try and shoot you with this double barrell shotgun, if i hit you, i win” Derick shouted, with a manic smile slathered across his face.

I was about to protest, but was cut off, when he suddenly shouted GO!

I panicked, what could i do? i did the only thing i could, i ran. I ran as fast as i could in my yellow fluffy duck suit, whilst being shot at by a mad man. Great start to the weekend i thought.

Half a minute had passed, and i already started to run out of breath, the extra weight of the suit took an enourmous toll.
Wait a minute! i thought. this suit might be thick enough to deflect bullets! i thought to my self.

I stood still, laughing at the man, who held a large shotgun to my chest.
The shot echoed through the air, reverberating through the trees. Blood trickled down from the large dent in my chest. I coughed and fell to my knees.

That was a bad idea. I thought.

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Comments (3 so far!)

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  1. Ahfl_icon THX 0477

    Funny and bizarre, as were both the one after this and those that followed. It doesn’t quite set up as a literal prequel with the guy being dead at the end of yours then asking about the bullets in mind. You could read it as a way-prequel, I guess, that this is the predecessor. Maybe I’m being too literal. It’s a nice take on the vague randomness of mine with more details as to the what and why, so that part works.

  2. Avatar H.S. Wift

    My comments:

    - This is a great piece on exploring the selective capitalization of first person presonal pronouns.
    - This is an interesting time loop of a hunt ending before it begins.
    - An innovative exposé on the necessity of commas in certain places that also questions why some grammatical areas shouldn’t have commas.

    All in all, not a bad attempt. You have a few points to work on, but there is definitely potential.

  3. Avatar Radical Yellow Duck

    Of course you know, this means war.

Inspired by

“This is only a test.” “Um, that being the case, do you suppose it’s wise to be using real bullets?” “Shu...

Test by THX 0477

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