The Straw That Broke...

Avatar Author: Amaris Wolfe I'm just walking in circles to find my way home. Read Bio

“Okay, what the hell!” Chris shook his head, trying to throw off the smothering hood and rattling the confining chair.“Seriously guys, not cool! Let me out!”
He could hear them breathing, but there was no response. What game were they playing? “Guys? I know you’re there!”
Nothing. “You assholes, I can hardly breathe in here! This isn’t funny anymore.”
“It was never funny, Chris.”
“What?” He couldn’t tell where the voice came from, but he knew whose it was. “Scott, buddy, tell me what’s going on. Remember when-”
“When you played that hilarious practical joke on me?”
“It was just-”
From his left: “Remember when you dumped my sister?”
“Sorry, man, but she was-”
Behind him: “Remember when you cheated and won the scholarship I had worked for?”
“Hey, bro-”
All around him: “Remember when you threw the championship game?”
“Guys, I didn’t-”
“It’s time for you to pay.”
The accusing voices were those of his friends-no longer friendly.
“No…we’ve waited long enough, Chris.”
With a howl, they descended on him.

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Comments (2 so far!)

Average Reader Rating

  1. Avatar Cheesy80s

    MMmmmmm…..This is very good. You should draw this out. Kinda a “Skulls” feel. I enjoyed this.

  2. Avatar Iris...Alone

    Interesting. I like it quite a bit, and your dialouge is very impressive. But I would have liked a better, well not better, but a stronger word or phrase to use at the end in place of “With a howl, they descended on him.” Maybe try using something with a stronger more violent pull that will interest your readers more. Other than that I have no suggestions, for this was actually a very splendid piece.

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