Avatar Author: MaddyRose aspiring and learning. thanks for your time! ♥ Read Bio

“Darling, how nice to see you again!” A pale, blonde woman wafted over to me in a cloud of perfume that contrasted the earthy smell in the air. “How long have you been waiting?”
“Oh, not long,” I grimaced as her nails dug into my arm in an awkward hug. “I arrived by steamer just this morning.”
“Steamer? Darling, you must go by aeroplane. It’s the only way to travel around here; the swamps are terrible. And the wild animals!” she gasped. “What a horrible awakening! I thought they were exaggerating about the hippos and mosquitos. The thing that perplexes me altogether, though, are the people here. They don’t seem to mind! But at any rate, let’s see it.”
“What? Oh! The ring,” I remembered a moment late that she was now my mother-in-law. “I… well… it fell off… on the boat. It’s gone,” I finished, looking down at my sneakers.
“Pooh!—those were trifles, anyhow. I’ll make sure you get a nice one this time, maybe a really grand diamond or something. Not to worry!” she continued, not even skipping a beat.

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Comments (4 so far!)

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  1. Avatar mark.i.wang

    Well done, this challenge is a toughie…

  2. Avatar MaddyRose

    Thanks! Sometimes it’s easier to write within constraints though… it gives me a starting point. :)

  3. Avatar August 2nd

    This story conjured up all kinds of imagery for me. Africa. A shaded bar in a shady hotel. Rattan furniture. Slowly turning ceiling fans. 1932 or thereabouts. An English battleaxe of a mother-in-law with perhaps a slight excess of self-confidence and who exudes the sense that she is entitled to get what she wants. A young woman married above her station and a bit intimidated by her new life with the son of an upper class family. Her first trip to the Dark Continent. Little does she know that they will, in 10 years or so, be living in a large ranch house on a sugar plantation in Zanzibar.

    I can see this so clearly and yet I don’t think that’s really the scene that you tried to set.

  4. Avatar MaddyRose

    Actually, you nailed it! That’s what I was going for. The story started out a lot longer and I had to cut out a lot, so I’m glad that the background came through.

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