Thirty One Nine Four Two

Avatar Author: HSAR Master of the Armory and Chief Nibmaker of Our Strange and Wonderful House. It's a pleasure to meet you. Like many others in this community, I have no qualifications for writing except a head full of ideas and a passio... Read Bio

// # MESSAGE BEGINS

Check, check. Text field entry mode activated.

// This message was generated by an automated system.

This is Aion Central Node 31-942. An unregistered and unauthorised chronotranslative vehicle has been detected. You are ordered to cease operation of said vehicle immediately and decommission the vehicle; or bring the vehicle to the attached co-ordinates for registration.

Failure to comply will be in breach of the Aion Directive and lethal force will be used against you. Lethal force in this definition includes any lethal weapon up to and including chronotranslation-inserted thermonuclear weapons of a yield not exceeding 300 megatons.

Upon receipt of this message preventative measures will have been deployed around your vehicle; any attempt to chronotranslate to a position other than the attached co-ordinates will result in the immediate destruction of your vehicle.

Thank you for your time. Have a nice day.

// Attached: Co-ordinates in Universal Space-Time Format.

// # MESSAGE ENDS

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Comments (5 so far!)

  1. Avatar ElshaHawk (LoA)

    oops. This time is hostile! Go back! They can’t destroy it if it doesn’t exist, right?

  2. Avatar Zerrakhi

    I can’t think of much to say on this one.

    If I were browsing the science fiction section of a bookstore and this was the opening scene of a novel, I’d have to read on before deciding if I liked it or not. It could be the opening scene of a great book, or it could be the opening scene of a terrible book. But it has potential.

    I like the use of “chronotranslative” which fits perfectly with the register.

    If I know my SF, chances are good that the hero will say, “Meh, they’re just bluffing” and turn out to be right. It sounds like an opening for a story that plays on contrasts, heavy on the technobabble in one scene, lighthearted or even comic in the next. Of course, it takes a skilled writer to pull this off well.

    Personally, I’m entertaining the idea that the lethal weapon alluded to is a cosmic flyswat (after all, it’s lethal to something, and certainly less powerful than a 300 megaton thermonuclear bomb). I’m not sure about this; maybe it’s too silly. But it’s the image that came to mind.

  3. Avatar BiC

    Ha! HSAR, my friend, you are the coolest!
    This story is funny and interesting all at the same time. The format works great. I wish I could write as ‘technical’ as you do, because I’d love to sequel your stuff. – Great job!

  4. Avatar BiC

    Sorry for second comment, but I forgot to give honorable mention to the line: ‘Thank you for your time. Have a nice day’. (Great line, especially after threatening to pound their vehicle with 300 megatons of explosives!)

  5. Avatar HSAR

    Thanks for all your comments!

    Zerrakhi – I do suspect our protagonist would have called the bluff. It’s hard to contain time travel…