Stories tagged “comedy”

  • Probably Not For The Best

    A laugh, receeding back into the darkness of night. It was long and low, creepy, as I stepped toward it. “What’re you doing?” Rochelle whispered angrily at me. “What do you think I’m doing,” I said to her and moved c...

  • The Woes of a Comedy Enthusiast

    I can’t write comedy. It’s quite tragic, but upon expressing my lamentations to an English teacher I was simply told, “Well a lot of people can’t write comedy while young. You need to empty yourself of all the serious topics you...

  • High (Heel) Maintenance [Part One]

    I placed my purse on the tacky, red upholstery my local diner filled its dining room with. I was too overdressed to be here, but I’m a 24 year old girl, how can I not want to show off? Especially with my boyfriend? I sat down and fixed my belt wh...

  • High (Heel) Maintenance [Part Two]

    I looked at Scott and he looked at me. I reached for his hands across the table and he embraced them. Unwillingly, however. “What’s the matter?” I said, concerned. “No, nothing. Just a long day at work.” He let go of my ha...

  • High (Heel) Maintenance [Part Three]

    That was the most I heard him talk all day. “Oh, so you have a problem with me looking good? I can’t help it. I work hard to look the way I do. If guys look, how is that my problem?” I took a sip of my water. That wasn’t the rig...

  • A Pun Most Noble

    “I beg of your pardon, craftsman.” The knight sat on his horse with all the poise of a man of his station. “Can you tell me, please, how do I get to the Duke’s castle from here?” The glassblower, preparing coal for the day...

  • Marie Curie and Calamity Jane Go to Pluto

    Marie Curie awoke. She had no idea of where she was, or even of who she was. Prior to her blackout, the last thing she remembered was her working late by herself in the lab, messing with a sample of radium. There was an explosion and a bright flash, or...

    • Author: Abstract
    • Posted about 7 years ago.
  • Marie Curie and Calamity Jane Reach Pluto

    “P…Pluto?” Marie asked. “What is that?” “Oh, just another dwarf planet,” Jane replied. She got a quizzical look on her face. “Say, where’d you come from, anyway?” “I…” Marie started....

    • Author: Abstract
    • Posted about 7 years ago.
  • Marie Curie and Calamity Jane Beat the Odds

    Klaxons blared. Lights flickered unpredictably. Sparks flew abnormally high in the feeble, six-point-seven-percent-Earth-gravity of the dwarf planet. And somehow, through it all, Marie Curie and Calamity Jane managed to make it through without injury. ...

    • Author: Abstract
    • Posted about 7 years ago.
  • A Short, Zombie Comedy (A Zomedy) Page 1 (Mature)

    “Run, dammit! Run as fast as you can! We’re almost there!!!” The moaning grew louder behind them as the hoard encroached ever nearer to the small, wooden shack. The large man ran forward and quickly unlatched the well-barricaded door....

    • Author: The Squibz
    • Posted almost 7 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • Frankly my dear, we're out of ideas.

    “Frankly, we’re out of ideas, Cinema’s in a rut, we need something new, so we’re going to back to the golden age and see what we can copy.” “Historical Drama? Gone with the Wind was huge!” “No, that’...

    • Author: Akheloios
    • Posted almost 7 years ago.
  • Zero Day (Mature)

    I felt, but didnt see, the shot. Just the feel of the recoil going up my arm like a sucker punch. I smelled the hot chemical stink of the burning powder, the planet-cracking BANG of the report, and the dull thump a microsecond later. I felt the hot fla...

  • Non-Sequitur to Common Sense (The Lord's Name Is Debbie btw)

    Who writes this non- sequitur Meter of non-sense? Promise not to applaud Writer’s that don’t leave comments They’re like ugly, bra-less broads Smugly speaking to one of the crudest, prudish gods Talking on and on in vain While jawless...

  • The Proof Is In The Pants

    What if, Perchance, The plaintiff, Sir Pants, Caught the defendants, Sir Pull, Mrs. Miserable, and Maestro Throw All hurling his purple girdle in a photo That’s dated The day he waited Bare brass button naked For the bus? Thus the catalyst For...

  • A Pretentious Alien's Poetic Perspective

    when what you can’t control outweighs what you can like time and the fact that you had no say in existence to begin with; would you consider fate to still be bitter or is it sweet mint and cinnamon and rain like glitter? Because it surely encompa...

  • Cruel Cocoon

    cruel residual jewel of venomous emptiness— in the dual mirror— a visual temptress stepping naked coming nearer; you can’t hear her spreading palm down on your chest with pink painted fingernails impaling, pulling off flesh dressed b...

    • Author: Tad Winslow
    • Posted over 6 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • Just don't do this, OK?

    Einstein always said that space was curved. Well, all right then. With the help of a little basic quantum physics (is there any other kind?), I built my new house into the fourth spacial dimension. I now stand in the hallway that runs through my house,...

    • Author: Petros
    • Posted about 6 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Galactic Space Babies

    “Ok, picture this- Galactic Space Babies!” “I’m sorry, sir?” “People love aliens, people love babies. I’m thinking Star Wars. I’m thinking Mars Attacks. I’m thinking Look Who’s Talking!”...

    • Author: J.S. Hope
    • Posted about 6 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • Quick Courtship-- Poetic Pick-up Line

    My likes Include Nice nights— The kind kind, Hot food, Spiced rice, A calm mind, And you— You’d suffice For a warm slice Of slumber under The morning skylights

    • Author: Tad Winslow
    • Posted about 6 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Breakfast with a side of Rhino

    Foster sat down to a plate of Belgian waffles, expecting that day to proceed as any other, and then a rhinoceros flew through his window. There was no particular rhyme or reason, all three and a half tons of it simply barreled through Foster’s pictur...

  • counting in binary.

    The teacher turns toward its students, “Class, does anyone know why we count in binary?” One pupil raises its arm. “Yes, Barry?” “It’s because we have only #10b claws on each pincer.” “Well… That&#...

  • scenes from a cantina.

    Tom’s throat is parched; his lips are cracked and bleeding. Pushing open the saloon-style swinging doors, he enters the small cantina. Tom has been walking for over a day, following a broken road winding through the blistering hot desert. When t...

    • Author: mark.i.wang
    • Posted over 5 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • a burrito at the cantina, headed to trouble.

    Enraged the dark shadow bellows in fury – but it has no power within the cantina. The saloon doors slam shut and the phantasm is gone. Jose casually cleans a glass, softly whistling. Tom, mid-chew, swallows – “So… this kind of t...

    • Author: mark.i.wang
    • Posted over 5 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • packing for a journey.

    Tom whistles softly, as he fingers Jose’s blanket poncho. The thick fabric has been woven over wrought chain mail. Jose dons the armored poncho with a grunt. He grabs a tattered sombrero, and begins rolling a small arsenal into a rucksack. “...

    • Author: mark.i.wang
    • Posted over 5 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Gary and the gin

    Sometimes Gary wondered if there was more to life than gin. Then he took a sip. “Sweet lord,” Gary said, for this particular gin and tonic tasted especially good. Even better than the one he had before. “I should eat something,”...

    • Author: grautur
    • Posted over 5 years ago.