Stories tagged “oops”

  • They call it dope for a reason

    Ok. Thinking things through wasn’t my strong point. But I was desperate. I needed money. A lot of money. And I needed it now. I couldn’t go back to Julio and tell him oops, sorry. I couldn’t tell him that while driving the van up to Worchester, I...

  • Martian Oops Two

    It costs a boatload of money to send stuff to Mars. Not just the launch and the fuel but the development and production is expensive too. That is why NASA contracted with the European Space Agency to develop the propulsion section of the Mars Climate O...

  • Winner Announcement

    Oh, I’ve done it all wrong. I put up a challenge but made it so wonky I can’t properly pick the winner. This, as well as putting the information on my profile, is the best I can do. Many, many thanks to the wonderful entries to my contrary ...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 10 years ago.
  • Jurassic Park in 10 Words

    Dinosaurs are safe because they can’t escape. They just escaped.

    • Author: uselessness
    • Posted about 10 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Two Questions in Space and Time

    “Did you hear what I said?” “Hrmm, yes.” “Great. And can you let me in the airlock now?” “I’m thinking about it.” “What I said or letting me in?” “Yes.” It was at this point ...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 10 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • The Sign Revealed

    As he strained his eyes at the vault above tears formed from the effort. Without rhyme or reason, some part of him was actually hoping for a shooting star. He cursed himself for the cheesiness of the feeling which only renewed the desire to end his lif...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 10 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Shart Attat!

    “Oh, Shart!” “Huh-what?! Henry, did you say shark? Is there a shark? Henry, the children!” “No, honey, I didn’t see a shark.” “Then why did you say shark?” “Sigh. I didn’t.” “...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 10 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • New Code Blues

    Timelog failed… Initializing Protocol NA551Epsilon7… Violet’s consciousness perked up and away from the stream of web data. This was new. This felt different. A new code was exerting itself. No, it wasn’t exerting. It was just d...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 10 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • Turn in the Weather

    That’s how it all started, which was fitting really. The sparkling burn of new romance warmed an October day leaving my cheeks more than a little red. Six months later, and clouds of April were beginning to give way to a Summer sun. We stood in t...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 10 years ago.
  • Enter Mrs. Detective

    The only thing that smells worse than wet dog is dead dog. I’d meant to wound the big idiot, but I’d also meant to not get pummeled. Priorities have a funny way of falling into place. “Thomas!” came the shrill call, preceding th...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 10 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • The Day of Swearing

    Things went wrong the first time on what I refer to as the ‘Day of Swearing’. I’d made a half dozen or so brief trips back, just experimenting, just looking. They went fine. I was fine. Everything was fine until I thought of her. She ...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted almost 10 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • The Lost Summer

    The next few months were a blur of denial, hair-brained attempts to put things right, and a few too many inebriated nights. I always think of that time as my lost summer. Since then I’ve refound those months, a few times actually, but that second...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted almost 10 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Expectations of the Bottle Deflty Swung

    Nearly void of its recent distilled contents, the bottle glinted in the array of lights in the bar. The yellow light over the pool table shone through its square sides at the apex of its arc. The blue from the neon Bud Light sign danced along its squar...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • Enunciate, People...Enunciate for Crap's Sake

    “Ladies, work it like you own it!” Esmerelda deQueervane called out from behind the curtain. The music thumped like a freight train on acid, and she was loving every second of sonic assault. The very night sang to her beneath the DJ’s...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • The Opponent

    Air in. Air out. All to silence. Jerald calmed his mind, one by one shutting out the distractions cloying at the edges of his thoughts. His agent, scheming and conniving, would wait for another day. The crowd, slack-jawed ingrates all, could just as we...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • The Inevitability of Swearing

    I did it right. The timing was perfect. Other me never showed to assail everyone’s ears with coarse vitriol. She came, and I was charming. By the time we parted ways her number rested comfortably in my pocket, and our first date occupied a place ...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • I Won't Tell

    History has a way of repeating. The same coffee shop where they met welcomed him back, as it did every morning. The regulars smiled, knowing what he didn’t know, a romantic surprise. A cup of his regular sat at his regular seat, ready for his reg...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • What It Could Be (Mature)

    Half-drunk and wholely-stoned Darren fumbled with the lock. He paused to scratch indecently, not that any of the neighbors gave a crap at 2 AM. Who gave a crap about anything at this hour, he thought to himself. Shrugging off the suspicion that the itc...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Swearing In

    He stands, an impressive figure, above thousands of people, waiting to speak “Today, fellow Americans, we make history, today, we win!” Applause “Today, it has changed, race will no longer be an issue” A pause “We are equa...

  • True Adventures in Parenting, Part 1

    From within Sam’s room came a panicked yelp. My first instinct was, sadly, “Oh great, more hysterics.” She’d just spent half an hour processing the impending first day of school with my wife, and I’d really hoped she’...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
  • True Adventures in Parenting, Part 2

    Before leaving to get my doctor bag I decided to give her something to do. I instructed her to plug one nostril and blow out the other. She plugged the left and went to work. I returned. Sadly, due to disuse, my otoscope was not working. My small but v...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted over 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Aim by Prayer

    Gut check time, Denton thought to himself, Man up. bear down. Cowboy up. Time for the big boy pants. With a deep breath he took stock of his motivational phrases; that was indeed the extent of ones he knew and felt were applicable at that moment. Based...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Philosophical Musing on Car Theft and General Schmuckery

    One floor down I was trying to make sense of Katy being there. Two floors down the stitch in my side morphed into a searing pain of epic proportion, or at least bad enough to make me feel like overstating. Three floors down the blood pooling in my shoe...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5
  • Dangerous Accusations

    We tumbled across the front lawn, the grass feeling wet and cool through my thin, pink pajamas. The goon howled as his knee burst into blue flames while his fellows looked on in amazement. Two more approached with practiced confidence only to be rebuff...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 9 years ago.
    • 4 out of 5
  • Small Change, Minor Mistake

    Kewan squirmed and fidgeted, a very unhappy little fairy. He had good reason, having been called before the Council of Cavitas, and he only a junior tooth fairy. Courtiers, guards and officials milled about him, all whispers and stolen glances. His min...

    • Author: THX 0477
    • Posted about 9 years ago.
    • 5 out of 5