Stories tagged “ridiculous”
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Mojo Hat
You know those stupid hats that people think are Jamaican? The ones with dreadlocks attached to them? Yeah, he bought one of those. Wore it around the apartment and sometimes cooked with it on. I remember one night when I just wanted him to take it off...
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Strangling Parrots
“What did you say to me?” Maya was angry with me again. No surprise there, really. All I had to do was walk into the room with my iPod playing too loudly and she’d find a reason to scream at me with that painfully shrill voice of hers...
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Gaming Affair
A long fingernail attached to a slender finger made its way down the spine of a truly magnificent game case. “So, Arkham, what do you feel like doing today?” the girl asked, continuing her ministrations seemingly unaware of the game’s...
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Jaws' Haiku
It’s taking the bait And we need a bigger boat Dude, we are so fucked
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If Mel Brooks Was Mayor
“She slept with him?!” I yelled. “Oh, you can’t say no to the mayor,” Eva replied matter-of-factly. “I said no to him once. He just gets so disappointed.” — “Make love to me!” the mayor cried ...
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Know Thy Enemy
The corsair descended upon the frigate like a bird of prey. Gravity cannons anchored them to the larger ship and the crew of the Last Man readied a boarding party. There were slaves to be had. Plunder was nice, but slaves were the real prize. On the Ya...
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A La Mode
She liked CAKE. Of course, when it came to cake, she liked pie more. Cake and ice cream took birthdays, she acknowledged, but pie had long since conquered the frontier of ‘a la mode.’ Drank water constantly. Like a mermaid on X. Chewed on h...
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To Actually Care (Previously 'Smacked Meek')
I bet I’ll wet my beak In the inlet Of what trend setter’s seek, Shedding floating feather’s as I speak, Lending, doling, spending cheddar For the doting chatter boxes Flying off of crocs Snapping at me by the rocks The waves are lapp...
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Just Write It
Just write it Don’t fight it Hit publish If it’s rubbish Let people doubt it And talk ‘ish’ about it Like, “that sound is clouded- It’s puddled on the grounds Of muddled meaning” Please read into the reasons Why I sway leaves off ...
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Rebellion
The day was sunny, the birds chirped outside, and in a small appartment in a big town, Danielle shouted at her progenitor. “There’s no way that bitch is coming to live with us.” was the only thing she said. He was left dumbfounded by ...