Stories tagged “wtf”
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In our minds, we're our own planets
Inside our minds, we stand on our own planets, revolving around our own suns. I got knocked out of my orbit – now we circle the same sun, you & I; you clockwise, I counter. * She steps out – the clouds are ready to piss all over her in a golden...
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Drunk Pussy
The pussy wants to be fed again. “Feed it to me again, meow” “Pussy, you’re starting to smell like tuna. I think you’ve had enough, woof” “I’ll tell you when I’ve had enough, meow”. She squirm...
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Public Mastication
Once there was a man who kept his love in his pocket; it was a black sticky thing, and small. The love smelled of ripe pears and seaweed. When he pressed his thumb against it, the surface dimpled, like raw meat. Specks stuck to his palm where he’d cu...
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Benadryl and Caffeine Don't Mix
In the seas above the earth, silent sulkers give wide berth; The fall of man still they lament, their unheard missives heavensent. The atmosphere is rarefied; many born, many died; Below, the wastelands idly rust, ash to ash, dust to dust. The palace c...
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I wish I would have worked in Halflings
As he stood upon the idling Mac truck, his sword-wand Stab-Caster in hand, Prince Adam Fire-Blade III surveyed his forces, which his grandfather had spent years building. Thankfully, his grandfather had died and there was just his father to go. From th...