Not your usual protagonist

Write a story with some kind of odd, or unusual, or evil, or inanimate protagonist, such as a potted plant.

This challenge was inspired by the six-day anniversary of having the soundtrack from “Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog” stuck in my head.

♪ I cannot believe my eyes! Is the world finally turning wise? Well it seems to me… Some kind of harmony… is on the rise.. ♪

EDIT: Protagonist=What John Perkins said

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