Who Are You?

I’m single. I like long walks on the beach.
Ummmm. What else is there?
I’m incredibly desperate and that’s why I’m on this damned site in the first place?

No. That wouldn’t work. The truth never works.

They never look like their picture. Thirty-seven dates – not one of them looks like their picture.

The photos are from a few years ago before the beer weight really sunk in.
The photo is the first glimpse you get of the person.
You see it before you get to the WHO ARE YOU? box.

A picture is worth a thousand words.
Proves how worthless words can really be.

You don’t see the bald patch, the sweat stains, the growing gut, the tacky Hawaiian shirt.

You don’t read about the little habit of burping, their distaste for showers, their affinity for R-rated movies.

All it says is “Hi, I’m a fun and sexy single.”
It doesn’t say much at all.

I stare at the WHO ARE YOU? box.
I don’t know what to put.
Then, my fingers tap on the keypad: Come and find out.

Sexy and single, indeed.