Cliché?
No. I think there is a lot of promise with your story. Possibly need a prequel to invite readers into the quest.
excellent snippet of what is a promising story.
I don’t think it’s cliché, but I do think it’s a bit passive: reading like a flashback rather than as it’s happening. I also agree with Marli that it probably needs a prequel in order to draw emotion from the reader. I hope the king has been assassinated, or is otherwise indisposed, leaving Mason to deal with whatever is wrong. ;)
I don’t think it’s cliché, but I do think it’s a bit passive: reading like a flashback rather than as it’s happening. I also agree with Marli that it probably needs a prequel in order to draw emotion from the reader.
I hope the king has been assassinated, or is otherwise indisposed, leaving Mason to deal with whatever is wrong. ;)
oldgraymare
Marli
Nancy
ZorkFox