oo who was he?

I’m trying not to give spoilers. It’s not easy. Again, this is really well written. Leaves plenty of mystery.

haha i agree with ELD. i love the set up. and very well told. Even if I do know the end =P

Well I don’t know the end, and I can’t guess at it either so that’s a good sign…!

This doesn’t flow quite as well as the first installment, just because I think it ends a bit quickly, but the mystery’s there and you’re obviously moving the plot into the action that will take place at the Festival… Reading on! MH :)

This part was a bit quick, and some of your sentence structure choices felt a bit off. Nit-picking, I know, but just trying to give constructive stuff. The story itself is still intriguing, but this one just didn’t flow as well.

REVISED!

And no longer forced.

He wouldn’t say, “ayudame” because that is too informal. He doesn’t know the person at the door, so he would say, “ayudeme,”[accent on the u] believe it or not. :P In the same way, he would ask, “Esta bien?”

Other than that, your Spanish is fine and your story is nice. :D

Andres isn’t being very formal for he doesn’t really want anyone to know he’s a Prince, let alone be there.

Which is mentioned in the future Ficlys.