Danged hard challenge, but it gave me a chance to use a theme I’d been mulling over, based on a legend among tribes of Papua New Guinea, an intertribal contention about whose sun deity was the real deity and whose was rotting away in a valley somewhere.

Wow, given the challenge this is absolutely phenomenal. Well done, indeed.

You might want to substitute “area” for “place,” since that is a five letter word. Also, you have some repeated phrasing in your last sentence that needs to be edited out. I still give this a five, though.

Doh, I knew I’d let one slip in. Thanks for the advice. I’ll go make some corrections now.

Great job!!! I was afraid my challenge would scare off too many ficliers, thanks for posting. ¡Cinco Lápices!

This is a fab bit of work, even if you do not look at the mini word side of it…

See how I rate in the same form you used?

Good lord it’s hard – and yet you have fine pace, tone and plot. I take my hat off to you sir! MH :)

Amazing job on tone and pacing; definately has a “translated” feel about it.

Milton? Is that you?

Man. Thought I was reading a page of Paradise Lost for a moment there. Great piece of work!

I can’t help but feel the four letter limit unnecessarily constrains this piece, but nevertheless I find it very well done!

Really nice execution of the challenge! Didn’t even notice the character limitation.

a worthy oponent. Well done…fits well.
I love how you still got some uncommon words in there. Still some posh language even in just 4 letters!
Nicely done!

nicely done! it has an old world feel, grammatically, and you’ve conveyed the legend and rift between the tribes as you set out to do. Bravo!

I must admit, on my first read-through I was mostly thinking “what the hell?” and hearing Uriah Heep in my head. After reading the challenge, I now say well done as usual, old boy.

I am trying to open a book with glue between the pages. The words are orated sublimely and the feel is as if the whole theme is compacted. Ominous THX.

A bar has been set. I have now, only to aim in hope.

A kudo to you. I gave this task a try and gave uo. Well done!

Even without knowing the challenge, I thought this piece was a tad excellent :P It was definitely old-world sounding, but just enough that the meaning was still clear while conveying some culture and mystery.

“Rules” in paragraph 3 – otherwise (and even despite it) this is amazing!