i think, for me, there are too many questions and not enough details.. Some of those questions could be revealed in her feelings, or her actions, showing us her uncertainty. But avoiding mentioning the setting makes the “I do” at the end a surprise twist. :)

Same comment, really – it’s a powerful place you’re describing, but the description itself relies on too many questions. Even before we get the “I do,” her gaze could be suddenly returned blankly by hundreds. Great subject matter, though. Your name also helps the term “real estate novelist” seem not so odd anymore.

Thank you for your guidance. I have implemented your suggestions and believe it is better.