It could easily be argued that Reed Stetson was the ugliest individual to ever walk the planet.

I’m no doctor, but if I were I would diagnose Reed as ‘ugly’ and prescribe cosmetic surgery.

Of course young Mr. Reed had thought of this but working in the back of a video store didn’t provide the best income; and there’s no way in hell management would’ve let him work in the front.

Being as ugly as Reed had many drawbacks and very few benefits. He never got dates or a good job and wasn’t respected by anyone. Now that I think about it there weren’t really any benefits at all…

Needless to say Reed was sick of people constantly commenting on his many moles or patchy hair and he was especially sick of constantly having someone point out the state of his nasal features. Reed was a do-er and had decided to do something about it.

Armed with a shotgun and an unhealthy dose of desperation, he went to pay a plastic surgeon a surprise visit.

Sadly, his epitaph now reads ‘died to make the world a prettier place’.