Me of the past,

I have some bad news for you buddy. You remember what you did last week? Yeah, that. You know what I’m talking about. I’m afraid I have some bad news for you.

The first part of this bad news (yes, there are two parts), is that no matter what you do you cannot stop what’s going to happen. That’s only due to time paradoxes so don’t worry about it too much (If it never occurred than I would have never written this letter to warn you and then it would happen, see what I mean?). So no matter what you do, you’re screwed. Bad break. At least you get a warning though right?

Part two of the bad news is that when they find out, and they will, they’re going to over-react more than you thought possible. I know it seems impossible but trust me, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet. The shit is going to hit the proverbial fan.

My advice for you? Get your shit packed. Don’t forget stationery.

Wishing you the best, from the Future You.

P.S. Can’t get much worse, may as well do it again before they find out. ;)