Interesting. A perspective from the employer.

First, you should work on punctuation.

Second, paragraph or I will kill you with lazers.

Also, it was a little confusing as to what was happening with the narrator. The last sentence in the first paragraph could have been better worded.

Thanks for the input. I know I sorta screwed this one a little but lets call it a ‘test steak’ if you will… to test what i could have done. The rest will be better

Yeah, I’m only half sure what happened. At first it seemed like the whole building was gone, then it seemed to hint that only this guy went up in flames or something. I definitely got her twisted relish in his demise, which came across nicely. Just some of the details got a little fuzzy.