I stormed up the stairs throwing all his clothes onto the floor.

“I hate you!” I screamed, as his chocolate-scented body spray was thrown against the wall, promptly exploding with a loud bang. Charlie ran up the stairs behind me to see the carpet coated in pillows and sheets.

“I hate you!” I yelled, as my fake-antique vase was smashed with an almighty roundhouse into the ceiling supports, sending shards of glass in all directions.
He clasped his arms around me, shouting “Nadya!” but stumbled back into the wall.

“I hate you!” I cried, as I pushed the potted plant over the banister and threw a porcelain statuette into the bath.

Suddenly I collapsed onto my knees and cried, huge tears, with Charlie looking at me intensely.

“Fuck!” I screamed. “My period’s coming!” as it dawned on me that I had torn down the house because he erased Judge Judy from the Sky+ box.