I like the magical feel of this water.

nice continuation! the troll being more than he seems is perfect!

I really like your figurative language here, like the contrast between “dirty, stubby fingers,” and “butterfly wings.” And the end sounds quite thought-provoking.

This reminds me of a Neil Gaiman story, in the best possible way, because they rule so this does too. Some very nice description that leads the reader into it, and a wonderful last line.

There’s a lot behind this story, which is really cool…neat metaphor.

Sweet story man :)

My only issue is that bit of dialogue seems seriously stilted :S

@Luke Nicolau:

I got a similar comment regarding the dialogue from someone I showed this to pre-publishing, but for me it helped contribute to the fairy-tale feel – and also made the troll seem quite frank and to-the-point. But, each to his own, I certainly see why you would feel that way :)

Thanks all for the comments – MH :)

Odd and magical and mysterious. Felt like just enough information for me to make some suppositions about what is going on. I also like that it provides a bit of a twist, like the popular myth is that the water creates the forgetting, when it’s really more of a rather unpleasant mind-rape by a troll.

So the question is, did our character get what they wanted, or no? What will happen?