aww =,(. very beautiful. thanks for entering =)

Painful, and a fantastic rendition of the situation.

So sad, yet poignant. Great job; I especially like the description of the changes her mind has gone through.

Excellent entry all around. I completely agree with everything that has been said thus far.

I really like the first paragraph in particular – I feel like most of the story is contained there. It throws a major switch using only two sentences.

Nice oh-my-gosh-that-didn’t-just-happen moment.

I was hoping to convey the suddenness of her death. Everything going through his mind, maybe a hope that things could still work out, but no time left. What kind of impact would that have had on him? I doubt he ever recovered. Maybe it ends up breaking him too.

In some ways you could have left out the middle portion. The introduction and flashback would still have maintained the painfully sad nature of this story.

Wanted to include the setting of her death and the fact that he was the one that shot her. I thought about including his reaction right after he did that, but it seemed better just to leave at that moment and pick up years later at her grave.

excellent

Brilliant!

Thanks!