Hard hitting and intense. I think that you managed to really convey a sense of place and emotion and character(s). I could definitely see this as part of a larger narrative (longer short story, novella, or book). Excellent work. I think that rises above your usual excellence.

Brutal and raw. I liked the slow development of the situation from bad to worse to ‘oh crap’. If anything could be improved I’d say maybe try to work in some alternatives for ‘said’, just to add some variety.

Did a minor edit about the “said,” but I’m thinking it might work better to just mostly remove them. Do I really need to keep emphasizing which of the TWO people are talking? Will come back to this.

I think what you’ve done is quite suitable. It isn’t necessary to identify them with every paragraph as long as the reader can easily identify who is talking, which we can in this story. The only one that I might drop yet is the “Chester reasoned” in the 4th paragraph.

Good call, August. Seeing as how she addressed him as Chester twice in the bracketing lines, it wasn’t really necessary.

Wow, brutal. Poor girl. You really got it there. Considering the amount of description you really managed to push their individual characters. Who’s Dale? The wife-beating husband?

Great story! My only remaining concern is with the title. The story seems to be dealing with fair fights, not honorable fights. The two are related, but not always the same.

Yeah, sometimes you write the title before you have the story take shape and these things happen. I fully agree with you and I’m changing it

The dialogue, imagery, and punchline are excellent! Great job!