Wow that is dark. Well written and powerful- but definitely dark. Each part is very good and well though out but I like the last three sentences best.

Definitely dark – the suggested subject matter is risky ground, but you handled it excellently…

The recurring ‘like me’ theme works well in building up a character without any direct description, which is a nice touch, and the conclusion has the satisfying finality that even ambiguous stories benefit from in my opinion.

My only spot was at the beginning of the third paragraph, you write ‘sitting on the quietly ’ – do you need an extra ’swing’ in there?

Anyhoo, a well-crafted piece indeed – MH :)

powerful.

Well written too, the main lines flow very well as a stream-of-consciousness, at the same time taking us along with the narrator through a very dark story.

You emphasized the main point without gushing out too many details, and without making it over emotional. Good job.

This reminds me of a song. It’s by the band Sick Puppies and is called Howard’s Song. It says almost the same exact thing. I like how you broke the flow at the end. Almost desparately. Well deserved win!