Not all monsters are fantastical or imaginary.

Ouch. You can taste the fear here.

Very well toned. The fear of a child is true fear. Well written.

This is good. I may have left the word mother out of it until the end somehow, but that’s just me. Still shows us that not all things that go bump in the night are supernatural.

Knew it was your mother but you could have made her a nice mom getting you out of a warm bed…..but then again not all moms are nice….

Wow, my first featured story!! Woooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well written. Sad that some monsters aren’t just fiction and some kids actually have to live like this.

Very good

Some monsters are not of the imagination, but rather, are faced each day.

This story is innovative to the challenge, articulate and in keeping with my favorite plot device, the “gotcha.”

Well done!

I won!! Wow, thank you!

I think there’s an odd break in feel from the first to the last. Everything after “don’t come in” just feels different to me. I agree that perhaps it would be punchier if the reveal was closer to the end.

Actually on reflection, it’s the descriptive paragraph of the mother that feels off. I can’t quite put my finger on it, sorry, I know that doesn’t help.

Ok, that came off as really negative. I like the idea and think it could really pop with some polish. Keep it up,man.

Congrats on the win – I really enjoyed this – though for the ‘gotcha’ effect to be really impactful it would have been nice to have the revelation at the very end somehow.

Still, a well-crafted piece, you can definitely feel the fear, which, considering the actual monster, is both frightening and sad – MH :)