to hell with saying goodbye

The moon had cast a long eerie white light that snuck past the drifting curtains and landed gently on my face. I glanced around the room, staring at my suitcase tucked neatly into the corner, reminding me that tomorrow I would no longer sleep in this house, but alone in some strange place among strange people that I didn’t know or love.

Love. That word tore through my heart at the very sound of it. I was no longer sure what its true definition was, not after all I had gone through in the past few days. Cast aside for someone new, waiting in the guest room to leave without a goodbye. He didn’t have the heart to even give me that.

My heartbeat quickened, and terror shot through my bones. Where would I go now that I no longer had a home or a lover? The future seemed too dim to face. My eyes focused on the little bottle of sleeping pills next to my bed. With shaking hands, I start to count as I swallow. 1…2..3…

To hell with saying goodbye.

The future doesn’t seem so dim anymore.

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