Have you ever been in a moment where something occurred that almost made you wet your pants? Where you were so shocked at an unexpected event that your mind froze and body couldn’t react? Maybe you discovered your significant other, such a stupid term, was cheating on you. Or maybe you just noticed the gun barrel pointed against the back of your head. Well the current situation is nothing like that, although it would appear that way to an audience. No, I just wanted to give the son of a bitch a head start before I tore his legs off.

The fucker broke into my room, climbing through the window that I had forgotten to lock. Honestly? I never lock the damn thing. I’m on the second story for god sakes. How that man got inside without anybody on the outside noticing is beyond my intelligence.

What he stole from me was a briefcase. Inside the briefcase was a dollar. That dollar was meant to buy me a snack from the vending machine at work. He discovered the door locked. He hears my laughing. Chainsaw!