“Fine, be like that, stupid dog,” Ben said, sulking towards the couch. He grabbed a pen and a scrap of paper from the coffee table and began to make a list.

“I need a mask; nun-chucks; rubber suit; shitloads of talc. Got list, will shop.” At this point, Schnitzel was fed up and began to howl ever so slightly to show his distaste.

“It’s a superhero shopping list, shithead,” Ben responded defensively. He began to daydream hero-like situations where he could smash through walls and take down armies of evil ninjas.

“Yesssss,” he said rather orgasmically, “Back off Robin. Batman is my bitch now. You’re just a bitch’s bitch, bitch.”