Commentary: I’ve always liked this song by Godley & Creme. It’s got a lovely touch of weirdness.
Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_-YiM2vZuo
Lyrics: http://www.mp3lyrics.org/g/godley-creme/i-pity-inanimate-objects/

I had never heard that song before, it is indeed odd.
You convey the atmosphere well and what lyrics you do use are smoothly included. Very fun and now I don’t think I can ever have sugar in my tea again!

Nice song choice! Never heard it before now but it’s good that you choose something so unusual. I agree, you have conveyed the atmosphere of the song well + I think you’ve chosen the right lyrics to expand :)

I agree that it is indeed a strange song. But I like your story even without knowing the song. It’s odd enough to stand out, yet makes sense. If only some people would wonder about such things more often, the world would be interesting indeed!

I like it. I like how dismissive the one is while the other one is watching him drop the cube, haha. There are people out there who believe that inanimate objects and people are of equal value, which is completely creepy, but interesting.

These are the things I wonder when I am telling the kids to stop jumping on the bed, or picking up a stuffed animal from under the table. I blame Toy Story for the inanimate object worry beginnings.

Swank. I really enjoy the offbeat perspective here. You’ve capture the quirkiness of that song and made something cool from it.