7:27am

My alarm has been going off for 27 minutes; I’m going to be late for work again. They told me three times ago it would be my last time. I wipe the vomit from my face and get dressed. I run some water through my hair and comb out any bits of food. On my way out the door I grab the bottle of peppermint schnapps from the floor of the kitchen to wash the taste out of my mouth.

7:41am

I hurry down the steps while unwrapping a pack of smokes. I shave in the car as I swerve recklessly through traffic. Stop signs are more recommended than required anyway. I don’t have insurance or money, so it’s not like they can leverage anything against me if I hit someone.

7:57am

I power through the last two cigarettes in my pack and take one last swig of the schnapps. As I open the door I reach for my Axe Body Spray and hose down. I hurry towards the door.

8:00am

I pull the keys from my pocket and open the heavy door, “Good morning children, today we are going to start class with some math. Please have a seat.”