ha! great explanation of the dust! Now, to what end do they do this? the story could go anywhere from here!

I think it lacks the allure of the original. By “solving” the mystery, the story is cheapened.

A mediocre story saved by the phrase “hurricane of halitosis”. I think your conclusion may be a little too specific, and the whole thing seems torn between “dead serious” and “cartoonish”. I’m rating it on the assumption that it was meant as the latter. If not, it needs some serious work.