Mary had a little lamb, its face was fresh as water;
But soon the lamb began to smell so she sent it off for slaughter.
It followed her around the farm, it didn’t want to go;
So she struck it with a baseball bat – a great almighty blow.
The lamb, it staggered to the ground; a sticky pool of blood
Began to form around her feet as the lamb fell with a thud.
The slaughterer came forth to speak as she began to sob.
“Don’t worry ‘bout the lamb, my dear – you’ve saved me half a job.”