The head of the Galactic Council sat down heavily, squashing one of his tentacles.

“This court is now in session, reviewing the war crimes tribunal from Procyon Six. For the prosecution, His Enlightened Quarkty from Proc Six.”

A blue thing in a tank wibbled.

“For the defense, Ms. Lindsey Lohan, from Earth.”

A blonde thing in a tank wibbled.

“The prosecution claims a war crime was committed. That unlawful fire was made upon defenseless ships in violation of the Rigel Conventions. How do you plead?”

“Not Guilty, Your Tentacled Majesty”

“I expected that. The plea is duly entered.”

“Your majesty! It is clear they shoot at everything!” wibbled the blue thing through it’s translating machine. “They even shoot at each other!”

“My God! They shoot at each other? ? What colossal idiot race would do that?”

The Head of the Council continued, after the court was cleared, “It is clear that the defense has no case, and that the punishment is deserved. Bailiff, you may proceed to wipe them out.”