It’s easier to sleep facing away from them. That way, when your eyes start bulging out and you start to bite your lip they can’t see. And when they say something smooth, and you reply with something stupid, they can’t see you open your mouth in a silent scream. If you want the awkward conversation to end, or if you want them to stop running their fingers along the inside of your thigh, it is easy enough to pretend to be asleep. You just have to focus on steadying your breathing, keeping your eyes closed and relaxed, and never reacting to anything they may say or do.

In the morning, it is pertinent that pretend to be late for something immediately after you wake up. This helps to prove the point that you could not linger in bed even if they wanted you to. Do not expect or initiate a kiss good bye. Put your clothes on. Pull your hair back. And Go.

That’s how you hook up.