You people have heard a fucking rant or whiny paragraph from me before. Maybe ten or twenty. I thank you for reading that and apologize for writing it. If you haven’t read any of that shit, please avoid it. Stream of consciousness bitching is some of the most pitiful crap on the face of the planet. We all know it when we write it, we know it when we read it, and yet we cannot look away. It’s like a horribly twisted fatal car accident before they stuff the gory remains into black bags (to abuse a tired metaphor).

So, tonight, I bring you something completely different:

Life is fucking awesome. Every moment that you’re on this side of the dirt is a goddamn blessing where you’re beating the odds. Celebrate your luck. Millions of sperm were slaughtered just to bring you, the winner, into existence. Even if you haven’t won since, you still beat out a few million other organisms in the most important race of all.
Enjoy the good times, because they never last, and endure the bad times, because they always pass.