I like the concept of a star calling to her own. What has the poor thing done to herself on Earth?? my goodness!
A couple of editing notes I’ll give you later. :)

I see a scene of abstract emotion and symbolism— it’s esoteric enough for me to draw different conclusions and it’s also logical enough for me to at least try to interpret:
You could be highlighting the changes that occur throughout our lifetime, as well as how immediate changes can swing the dynamic of our perspectives. I mean, you’ll probably never look at the stars the same way you did when you were a child— full of wonder— when new discoveries were as endless as your energy. We change, we go from white to dark quickly, or maybe slowly, but it seems like things differentiate from even itself inevitably. To me— this story is about becoming something different and then returning to our true form with that new experience— a part of us forever.

I realised how many times I wrote ‘sky’ and removed them =|

Lovely and magical. Feels like it borders on allegory, magic, or just inspiration. Very interesting to read after reading where Elsha took it next.

I tried to keep her drug addiction and gauntness in there, but add in a job that pointed out sweetly where her heart was.

Reminds me of Stardust by Neil Gaiman.

‘unvoluntarily’ is involuntarily.

You know I’ve noticed that you’re attempting something new with your delivery of details and story (and even language) here… that recognition of style had escaped me the last time I read this for some reason, but I see it now, I don’t know exactly what is so different… but I recognize it as a new direction for you. Maybe that’s because it’s poetry hiding in prose’s clothes… hmmmm

“…black expanse of cloud…” I want so desperately to add an ‘s’ to ‘cloud’ equaling ‘clouds’ or add an ‘a’ in between ‘of’ and ‘cloud’.

And… did you miss a ‘the’ in this sentence by chance?… “Shadows dripped from (the) skeletal figure like ink…” ?

Ok, thar be my entire two cents on this one, PJ, not because I couldn’t fill up this comment section with the largest comment of all time…but because I’m too comment self conscious to do so! hee-haw!

I adhered to your first and third amendments Tad however it is supposed to read as ‘black expanse of cloud’/

I was standing outside a grungy old public toilets after a play I appeared in, looking at myself in a shiny window across the car park and the poetic language blossomed in my brain so I had to write it down. The entire of the first and second paragraphs was written whilst shivering in the cold wearing a business dress and little else.
This is also completely the way I think. I think in poetic language and not the short staccato miseries that echo from the mind of my past.

Good enough, now that I know it was intentional I can begin to appreciate that line more. Otherwise I’d forever be wondering if it was a mistake!

I like hearing about what inspired you— it’s a story within itself— a non-ficly if you will.

More of an un-ficly, I’d say. But that’s just two cents from a stranger. Cheers! For the record, I agree with Tad as far as hearing about inspiration goes.

Definitely reminiscent of Gaiman, as Robert said – but that’s high praise!

For me, the lead-up to the star conversation felt a bit forced – Ruby’s pointed face involuntarily turning towards the sky didn’t flow right in my head.

Perhaps if she had felt compelled to do so, but more by a feeling than a force?

Still, all that’s mostly irrelevant – as the suggestions of a star on Earth, a mysterious House and a Queen missing her daughter are enough to intrigue me to read on! MH :)

@ Robert
Based on how fiction is to ficly — it seems logical that non-fiction would be to non-ficly, to me anyway. I can still appreciate your unficly way of thinking though.

Congrats on the story and the feature Jae

Great feature, and great series for all the involved authors. Still wanna see where it goes…