This is going to be terrible, I thought. There is no way we’re going to come out of this unscathed. Richard, we all know you’re about as dumb as they come, so why do you persist? You’ve made us both into the laughing stock of the town. Dammit, everyone’s smiling now, they know what’s coming next. “We’re eager to hear more, Richard.” one of them chirped tunefully.

Richard was wearing this big stupid grin now that I only wish I could pound into oblivion. He continued, "Oh yeah? Well, the character he’ll play will be some theoretical physicist, ex-spec ops dude who accidently divides by zero and blows up the universe. But instead of being erased out of existence like everyone else, he’ll be thrown into a parallel universe that’s ruled by some totalitarian vampire empire that pilot giant, organic mecha suits called “biodroids”. And these “biodroids” are fuelled by the flesh of living beings whom the vampire empire enslaved. So of course when Will Smith sees this he gets all pissed off, like super-pissed off…"