I love this. A lot.

I wish I knew how to pronounce Stuyvesant. Like it’s spelled? I don’t know.

I think it’s generally pronounced “stoy-VESS-ent”, Olivaw.

Mickey the Bee is a fantastic name for a small time crook. Really well done, I’d definitely like more!

Thanks, Usagi. It was originally “Mickey the Weasel”, but I thought that was a bit tired and overused.

I’m new here, and not sure of the protocols. How does the whole “more” thing work? Do I go ahead and write a sequel? Or do I just hope that someone eventually gets to it?

You can absolutely write a sequel to your own stuff, or a prequel if you feel like it. I would volunteer but I am horrible at writing noir/hard detective style.

Really liked this. I’m listening to Waits right now so that just helped with the atmosphere.

Man, this is what I call prose.

Although for some reason I keep hearing Robert Evans narrating it.

a nice pulp homage

I agree with the other commenters. I especially like how you use the jargon to set the mood.