What The Hell Do You Think I'm Doing!?
I erupt, “What the hell do you think I’m doing!? Of course I’m going to work!” Silence.
I locate my shoes— the last step to completing my attire. I kneel down to tie them, feeling remorseful for shouting back at her. We both know that today is just like any other. When we depart there is always a chance we won’t rejoin. We’ve taken steps to assure a good bye, even when it’s hard. And, if it’s right, a kiss that has something sweet to say through its lips.
I stand pressing a knee into the mattress and lean over her. “I’m leaving now. Good bye, sweetheart.” I try for a quick peck but she’s quicker with an escaping cheek.
It doesn’t upset me. Through it all I know that she’ll be glad I tried to. Later, when we return to one another, we’ll cook dinner and everything will be fine.
I keep my face close for a few seconds more. Seconds that I don’t even remotely have. Then she turns and gives in on that kiss.
“I love you”, she says.
Oh, dear God, I think— not knowing if I feel the same way.