Modern-day critics have claimed that this discrimination arose from the unwillingness of Noah and his layabout sons to shovel mammoth manure, rather than from sheer malice aforethought, but biblical records that might perhaps settle the issue are scarce.

In fact, mammoth are mentioned only twice in the entire bible.

“Ah,” you exclaim. “Dearest Leecat, mayhap you’ll tell us where, exactly?”

“No,” I gently explain. “You are the reader here. If I start doing your job, will you do mine? I don’t think so. Not for my pathetic wage, that’s for sure. But if I DO catch you doing my job, I’ll slap that keyboard out of your hands like it was Mike Tyson’s date.”

Now – as I was saying – this leads us to this one unmistakable fact: TWO mammoth entered the ark. NO mammoth exited the ark. Our conclusion?

Murder.

But National Geographic and their well-heeled cronies don’t want you to know the truth. Lots of fancy words like ‘climate change’ get bandied about, but the real truth is ugly, ugly Murder.