I like it! It hadn’t occurred to me that the Farmer would send his son, though I suppose it is more likely than hired help. My only criticism is the last two sentences both begin with ‘He’ so they stick out. It doesn’t break the story or anything but it is noticeable.

You’re right about the repetition of the “He.” I removed that and the adverb to make room for his name, so hopefully that fixes things.

And yeah, I figured most small-town farmers either have a big staff or use their families, and something about the tone of your story made me feel like it was more of a small family farm, on the edge of starvation kind of thing, since it’s horror.

nice! i thought it was the farmer himself.. but this is a great intro!

Thanks! I would have though that too, but I figured the language of “messenger” was intended to be telling, in the parent piece.

it was a change he made! i can see it now.

Good simile use!