stressful, but it seems the males have this all figured out. Follow the step-mom’s cue, fake it till the game is over!

Talk about condescending— telling someone their too young to have real problems? bs. I like how seamlessly you move the reader along— focusing on the utility of language to drive the story and not getting caught up in vast gardens of flowery phrases. You remind me, distantly, of Ernest Hemingway sometimes— right to the point. I’m not trying to compare you two or say anything ridiculous— but I do see some of his style in yours.

I would have liked to know more about why she protested and was upset; everything seemed to be going relatively well. I didn’t find her to be that sympathetic because I couldn’t figure out her reasoning.

@Cally; The point is more the fact that she feels that this is too soon, and not that it wasn’t going well.
Meeting the parents is a big thing and even though everyone at the table was fine with it she was having a panic attack due to the imprtance of this step in her relationship.

That said, it may only be clear to me. Some stories I write don’t work so well because I get so caught up in the fact that I am experiencing what the character is, and so I don’t realise how it could be unclear to others.

@Tad; Wow, what a compliment! I thank you greatly. I’d hope you wouldn’t give me a 5 for friendship, considering the difference between my two ratings.

I always appreciate honest comments.

I got the sense that the protagonist felt trapped and patronised on all sides. Some of the specifics weren’t explained, of course, but I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing. Exploring unanswered questions are what sequels are for :)

There are two ways I feel this could be taken – the first is NOBODY REALIZES THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THIS.

Which isolates the main character… and no one can understand her actions, since they doesn’t perceive them as reactions to an event they see as the milestone it is to her.

In my own personal projection – it would be more 5th Wheel feelings. Everyone gets along so well that she is displaced suddenly and with a dreadful sense of finality.

" ignoring any looks I shot her way/I was cornered, and the corner was small/my voice was snuffed out." It seems at though her opinion doesn’t matter.

The second paragraph seems worded oddly – but that might just be me. I understood it, just think it could flow a little better.

The more they don’t take her thoughts into consideration, the more on edge she gets. The more nervous and uncomfortable she acts, the more isolated she feels. The more isolated, the more she wishes this wasn’t real.

Until she wishes she didn’t know him?

Is it self-obsessed to be amazingly proud of the line “I was cornered, and the corner was small.”? Ever since RT drew attention to it above, it’s been running around my head.

Is the last line confusing?
I meant it as the feeling of wanting the horrible situation to have not happened. To go back to the normal situation of hanging out with her boyfriend like regular and not having the mountain of stress. When I’m under stress that tends to be the feeling I get.

I don’t think so – it’s a good phrase, that expresses an idea and feeling clearly.

The ending conveys disbelief, a desire to realize that reality isn’t occurring, and the sickening acceptance of cold hard fact, to a point. Desperation.

Personal opinion: it works very well.