I like how you’ve balanced the challenge of creating a real 16th century voice, without using more words than necassary. Sometimes the tendancy to babble with period pieces is hard to avoid. I know this from experience!

Studying this recently? :) I love when snapshots from history are given life again! If all history book were written like this, I’d have done so much better in class.

The quest for the fountain of youth? Nicely written and feels very authentically ‘in the moment’. The wording in the sentence about their eyes being tilted down felt a bit odd, took a reread or two. I think you’re just using ‘commonly’ in a way with which I’m not familiar. Great job on the suspense too—really makes the reader wonder what they’re about to find and what will happen when they do.

The image of a forest as a cathedral is very evocative. The combination of the title and the first line drew me in.