Her name is Monica.
She is a bitch to have around.
And she is sitting right in front of me.
Chomping on her expensive medium rare steak she had to order.
Why did I choose an expensive retaurant.
That’s right.
I didn’t.
She did.
If only she would just drop dead.

In an instant Monica fell face first into her steak.
Allen looked around the restaurant to see if anyone noticed.
No one did.
He slowly nudged her head.
“Monica,” he said.
Monica didn’t move.
Allen lifted her mashed potatoed head up.
“Monica?”
Monica didn’t respond.

“Oh my god!” screamed a woman sitting a few tables over.
“That woman is dead!”
Allen dropped Monica’s head back onto the table in shock.
Holy shit!

Everyone in the restaurant began to panic.
“She’s dead!”
“It must have been the food!”
“Don’t eat the food!”
“Ahhh, we are all poisoned!”

Allen began to hypervenilate.
Shutup everyone! Calm down! You are too loud!

In an instant everyone in the retaurant dropped dead.
Allen screamed.
This was not what he meant.