Wow. I like how raw and truthful the voice here is – nothing flowery, poetic or artistic about this suicide, it’s the brutal, messy truth of things…

Great work – MH :)

That’s pretty freaking awesome.

Thank you! This was my first day on the site when I wrote it.

Great job Martin! I liked the straight forward approach.
Liked: Christ, I’ll wake her up.

Wowe this is pretty cool. The voice is of someone clearly disturbed and the tone is just so average and real.

Although, it being a continuous stream of thought, I think your paragraphing is in the wrong place. Either there should be none or it should be when there’s a percieved gap in the train of thought.

It’s so honest. So human. Good job!